(Extremely) High Fashion: NASA's New $200-Million Space Suit

NASA has commissioned a special outfit costing over two hundred million dollars.  It's intended to appear on that most exclusive of catwalks, which you may know as "the moon", which has only featured one outfit in the last fifty years.  Which frankly kicks the hell out of anything Versace has ever managed.

The designers are a worldwide selection of firms gathered under the contracting banner of Oceaneering International Inc.  It includes outfits ranging from the grand-sounding United Space Alliance (of Houston) to the slightly smaller seeming "David Clarke Company".  We assume Mr Clarke knows his spacesuit stuff quite well.

The suit is planned to be an all-seasons affair, coping with everything from launch stresses to extra-vehicular activity.  The design document also features the best euphemism in the history of mankind, stating that the suit should be able to cope with "off-nominal" situations like depressurisation.  You show me an astronaut who can say "Houston, we have an off-nominal situation" when stuck in a spaceship with a hole in it and the air screaming out, and I'll show you proof that NASA have finally gotten those androids they've wanted ever since watching The Next Generation.

The change from the classic but slightly unstylish "big white suit" is part of Project Constellation, a concerted effort by NASA to revitalise the space mission and take advantage of the fact design has advanced a little in the last couple of decades.  With missions for moonbases and the outline of further Mars exploration, they're doubtless hoping to springboard from recent Mars excitement back to the role of "We're the people who GO TO SPACE!", rather than the inglorious position of "satellite repair service".

In even greater awesomeness, this ultimate in outdooring gear has multiple configurations.  By replacing pieces of the standard suit with customized extras, the regular outfit can be reconfigured for moonwalking (non-slip backwards moving boots not included).  Finally, NASA have wised up and started taking inspiration from cartoons!  So far we only have "Configuration 1 (space)" and "Configuration 2 (Moon)", but expect "Arctic Rescue", "Jungle Warfare" and "Anti-Doc Terror Suit" upgrades in stores near you soon!

Posted by Luke McKinney.

Swanky new space suits http://www.nasa.gov/mission_pages/constellation/main/spacesuit.html

Comments

[nepharous]

In a culture dominated by chatch phrases you cannot go wrong with
NASA, WE'RE THE PEOPLE WHO GO TO SPACE!
iT'S GREAT!!!! It's got balls and bravado and kids will love it. Imagine living in a world with heroes again!!!

[Ali S.]

And here I was hoping to see a suit with flame decals on it! I hope in the next 50 years when everyone can own a space suit of their own you can customize the paint jobs on them! :)

[diano]

i wonder if they make space camoflauge. you know for the aliens. so they dont see us. :p